What are the steps of recovery after discovering your spouse has cheated?

by Kris
(Canada)

What are the steps of recovery after discovering your spouse has cheated?

I find I go from being in shock to being fine to being very sad to jumping back into a weird kind of denial to being angry to being okay, etc. I am waffling on whether or not I want out of the marriage.

I found out a month ago about his infidelities. I feel chemical a lot. I would also like to know on average how long it takes to be the same as I was before.

I was basically a calm and trusting person. My trust has been trashed. I tell myself I'm not a victim but sometimes I feel pretty stupid about the entire relationship. I feel like an idiot right now.