Signs of an idiot?

Signs of an Idiot?

Been married 16 years have two children 8 & 7. Relocated to another state so wife could be closer to her family and our children could grow up with their aunts/uncles etc. Bought a house for her and the children, employment has been a roller coaster ride from hell which has resulted in periods of unemployment.

Wife started working at a local retail store of which she is over qualified. She has been working there over a year part time and I am now working out of town and home on the weekends.

I have reached a point where the weekends are not enjoyable anymore and except for th kids do not look forward to going home.

The tension is always high, intimacy is non-existant. In discussing the issue of my wife working the weekend, she always gets defensive when I suggest that she take the weekends off to spend more time with me and the family.

Our family and friends think that it is insane that she work the weekends when we dont need the money.

Last week I gave her an ultimatum that she quit the weekend shift totally and that we go to see a marriage counselor. I got the COLD shoulder all weekend without any intimacy or exchange of dialogue. I am out of town Mon-Fri and have not heard from her since I left on Sunday. No phone calls, anything.

Am I missing something here?

Thanks for your time and consideration.